The Xmas When I Grew Up Too Fast

Content Note: childhood, family dynamics, shame When I was either a little girl about 5 or 6 years old, I wanted a baby doll that wet its diaper for Christmas. This was somewhere between 1975-77. I was quite thrilled when Santa brought me that doll. It wasn’t quite as fancy as some of the other […]

Ten Thanksgivings Without My Family

Thanksgiving placesetting

Content Note : trauma, neglect, family rejection, mental illness I don’t clearly remember the details of the last holiday meal I spent with my parents, but I know it was ten Thanksgivings ago. We were at Laura’s mother’s house and they were late. I was struggling mightily with mental health symptoms and not admitting yet […]

Saying “No” is a Revolutionary Act

setting boundaries

Recently, I blew up at another LGBTQ advocate who made some choices that I found questionable. I ended the conversation by telling them “Please don’t message me. I need a break from you. Thank you.” A week later, they unexpectedly sent me an expository email to help me understand their perspective and tell me how […]

The Art and Science of Unmaking Friends

Pittsburgh friends

Do you find it easy to make new friends? Tell us how you’ve mastered the art of befriending a new person. The fastest way in the world to shed yourself of a friend is to tell them the truth – the truth about your diagnosis, the truth about your needs and expectations, the truth about […]