Pgh Lesbian Correspondents

Yesterday, I gave some thought to legal and living expenses. It seems the reasons I set it up, the intentions behind your gifts, and the expenses I covered should be a source of shame for me.

There’s no shame in asking for help. No shame in accepting help. No lack of transparency – I’m an oversharer by nature.

I’m not ashamed, I’m sad. I grieve a life where I didn’t have to worry about every little penny. It wasn’t a fancy life, but it was solid and steady. My grief is rooted in far deeper losses.

Right now, I’m forgoing dental surgery because I have some big vet bills coming up.

I’m not buying a pair of sneakers I need or getting a haircut because my webhosting fees and plugins renewals are due.

These are not unreasonable sacrifices, but they aren’t noble either. I don’t have many choices. I do have obligations to these critters and the community.

The only vacation I will have since 2023 is an overnight trip to Tionesta to see the Firefly Festival with friends who have an RV. And that will probably be it for a long while.

I spend $60/month in prescription copays, another $50 for OTC meds, and $150 in copays for therapy. Now add on physical therapy copays (hence the need for new shoes.) I could lay out the budget, but I think you have faith in me. I was accused of running a con so I went directly to GoFundMe and asked them if there was any concerns. No reports ever filed, but they reviewed it at my behest and all is well.

I don’t need a lot of things – I have clothes, electronics, lots of throw pillows, access to the library, etc. I have access to a vehicle (almost.) I don’t need jewelry or fancy stuff. I have several coats and pairs of gloves.

I don’t even mind talking about this because I know so many people, many with disabilities, who have it the same or worse than me. Some do paid work, others do not. Some are married with children, others not.

What we have in common is that we are poor. Being poor means we must endure heightened scrutiny of every decision we make – the food stamp/grocery store effect only in every part of our life.

I guarantee someone is reading this thinking I should go to a low-end hair salon or buy shoes at Gabe’s, God forbid I get a streak of color in my hair. My frivolous decision to buy the shoes my physical therapist suggested because of my health issues should be between my healthcare provider and me. But capitalism and a charity mind-set say otherwise.

So, yes, I need more funds to pay for

• oral surgery
• new sneakers/hiking boots
• haircut
• lawyer fees
• other legal fees
• filing fees
• deposition fees
• more lawyer fees

I also need to find a shallow ceramic dish for our senior cat because she flips the regular bowls. I can probably find that at a thrift store but I have to get to a thrift store. I need some placemats. Nothing that breaks the bank. Just hard to get to somewhere to purchase at an affordable rate.

Granted, I should probably confess. Last year someone gifted me with a $150 gift card to a retailer. I used it to buy a futon for the attic – I had to pay $4.03 cash. It arrives tomorrow and Tyler is assembling it on Friday evening. Someone else gifted me with a gently used large screen smart tv. All I need to buy is a tv stand that’s cat friendly and hopefully that can happen during Prime Days. Or it will wait. But I think this will be a game changer to have space to stretch out that’s not my bed, to hang with the cats, to enjoy the view. And all because people cared enough to share with me.

Yes, I could have used the gift card to buy shoes, but my physical therapist suggested the futon would be more helpful in the long run.

Being poor is a lot of work. And the pay isn’t that great ….

If you want to help me, here are my accounts

• GoFundMe bit.ly/HelpLGBTQBlogger
• Venmo @Pghlesbian
• Paypal.me/Pghlesbian
• CashApp $Pghlesbian