Are You Really Thinking of Me?

I appreciate the many expressions of sympathy about the death of my mother. The situation is complicated by a lot of trauma at the hands of other, now dead, family members and the many family members (all of them) who enabled or denied their predatory violence. In truth, every adult in my family on both […]

Processing Trauma with EMDR: Week Five

EMDR Trauma Processing

Content Note: trauma, EMDR, child abuse, sexual assault For more info on EMDR, talk with your therapist or visit this page. We decided to incorporate Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) into my therapy. Time has been the major constraint, so I’m documenting on my blog as a record for myself. You can read other posts […]

‘Nowhere to breathe easy’ – That Time When Anxiety Spoiled My Chance to See Heart and Joan Jett Perform. Here’s How It Happened.

Heart Joan Jett Anxiety

We may still have time, we might still get by Every time I think about it, I want to cry With bombs and the devil and the kids keep coming Nowhere to breathe easy, no time to be young But I tell myself that I was doing alright There’s nothing left to do tonight But […]

I Need Something Human

Foster Kittens

This week has been intense and I’m struggling to figure out what comes next for me. Not in some big grand mysterious plan sort of way, but in an introspective “Am I the person I want to be?” sort of way. On the ‘yes’ side of that question – I trapped five homeless kittens at […]

Four Phases of My Mental Illness Journey (So Far)

CN: mental illness, mental health industry, child abuse, sexual violence, Catholic Church My mental illness journey has four significant chapters, beginning with my decision to seek help. I use the term “phase” rather than stage because it isn’t so much that they play out this way in most people’s lives as my being able to […]

I Miss My Parents

Sometimes, I think about my parents or my brother or his children. Those thoughts are accompanied by deeply painful, gut wrenching feelings of loss, separation, and grief. We are not separated by death, but by the truths and transgressions of our lives. I haven’t spoken with my brother in nearly a decade and I last […]

A Hard Reset to Cope with Complex Trauma

Mental Health Awareness

I really appreciate my friend who sent me a GrubHub gift card in lieu of a casserole. That’s a classy move. So I’ve just returned home from therapy – it is a difficult bit for me right now so I’m going 2x week now and trying to figure out what has triggered me. I feel […]

Facing Complex Trauma as an Adult

Trauma Informed Care Persad Center

I’ve blogged in the past about my journey living with mental health diagnoses and trying to access resources for support. For many years, I’ve been dealing with the dual diagnoses of a major mood disorder and anxiety disorders. And I’ve referenced growing up in a neglectful family surrounded by addiction, untreated mental health issues, chaos, […]

I recently learned that I am experiencing a trauma reaction, stemming from the complex trauma I experienced as a child and young adult. I knew the trauma happened, but I had a tendency to minimize it as something not as serious as depression or anxiety. The cumulative impact of the Grand Jury Repory on Sexual […]