Safe in my flower box garden?

I’ve been sticking close to home lately. It helps to manage anxiety and sadness to be in a safe, comfortable space. It’s a tradeoff because I feel lonely, but my projects are doing okay – cat food drive is helping a lot of folks, Q&As are booming, and occasionally people offer to come see me […]

Anxiety Ruined My Chance To Meet Damon Young

Damon Young

It’s a beautiful sunny spring day here in Pittsburgh. Chilly, but I can get away with leggings and a light cardigan. I’m  sitting in the parking lot of my therapist’s office, listening to the oldies station and trying to soak up some sunshine – to feel some fragment of joy. I feel only misery. Yes, […]

Four Phases of My Mental Illness Journey (So Far)

CN: mental illness, mental health industry, child abuse, sexual violence, Catholic Church My mental illness journey has four significant chapters, beginning with my decision to seek help. I use the term “phase” rather than stage because it isn’t so much that they play out this way in most people’s lives as my being able to […]

I recently learned that I am experiencing a trauma reaction, stemming from the complex trauma I experienced as a child and young adult. I knew the trauma happened, but I had a tendency to minimize it as something not as serious as depression or anxiety. The cumulative impact of the Grand Jury Repory on Sexual […]

My Latest #Hysterecovery Update

lesbian hysterectomy

I haven’t posted an update on this recently, so let me remedy that today. I had my surgery on January 10 so I recently passed the four month mark. In terms of the actual hysterectomy, I’m doing pretty good. No significant physical problems with the exception of having to pee a lot more often and […]

Reverse Seasonal Depression and Spring

Sue Kerr hysterectomy

It is early this year, but the absurd weather patterns incumbent with climate change are wreaking havoc on my health once again. I’ve blogged about this in the past: There is a thing called ‘Season Affective Disorder’ or SAD which ties depression to the lack of light and seasonal changes. It effects about 4-6% of […]

The Season of Depression Has Sprung

I’ve been depressed. For months. Long months, wearing down my mind and my soul and my heart. Months where I continued to take my prescribed medication and see my therapist and do all of the things. Sometimes I show up to do public things, sometimes I do not. If you wonder where, I’ve been – […]

Anxiety Doesn’t Always Win

Anxiety Doesn’t Always Win

I am seated at a table, two magazines clutched in my hand. I put my bag next to my chair and carefully stack the magazines on the empty table. Deep breath. The aroma of coffee fills my senses. The space is pretty empty, so it would simple for me to approach the counter to order […]

The Anxious Life, Part Two

Since I work up Sunday morning and read about the mass murder of predemoninantly Latinx LGBTQ people in Orlando, I’ve been in a perpetual state of terror. I read two or three articles to get a sense of what was happening and as I cried, my heart started to thump ominously. I felt the familiar […]

The Anxious Life: Part One

This morning, I woke up to hear one of the cats crying and I immediately thought ” He’s dying” and leapt out of bed to race down the stairs. Of course, Boris was fine, just hungry and a little grumpy. Boris is 20 and tough as nails for a 5 lb scrappy cat whose only […]