Pgh Lesbian Correspondents

Divorce means I will be homeless.

Divorce is happening, just a matter of how long it takes for the judge to sign the decree.

30-60 days later, I have to walk out the front door and go … where?

There is nowhere for me to go. No program, no housing community, no shelter. There is the street.

I am trying very hard to save myself. I had a local nonprofit, Pittsburgh Center for Disability Justice, survey my housing options. They found the same conclusions as I did – there is nothing.

But I’m still trying. My ‘idea generator’ is still churning out possibilities. I’ve begged every friend I have to help me. I’ve contorted myself inside out trying to fit into a system that doesn’t want me.

The Systemic Gap

There’s the system of the courts. They can only do certain things. Courts can divide marital property like houses, but they cannot make sure everyone is housed. I didn’t know that. But it makes sense that they have defined parameters where they operate.

There’s the social/public safety net – human service programs, housing programs, food insecurity, etc. These are programs that also have constraints and limits. This I knew. But I didn’t realize quite how stark it is.

In the middle of these systems is a gap – where a court ruling leaves off and a safety net is too frayed to help.

If you fall through the GAP, who will catch you? What do you grab onto to climb back up? Will you land or just keep falling? Most professionals in these fields – especially homelessness – say avoiding the fall is only real hope – finding housing

What we need in my case is a private safety net of friends and supporters who will use their resources to catch me and give me a chance to climb back up. This is not a sustainable solution, but it could buy me a year of peace/calm while possibly pursuing an appeal .

My Own Private Safety Net

My goal now is to put together a net to ensure I have housing for a year or so. I do not anticipate the divorce outcome favoring my needs, so I need your help to save me from the GAP.

My friends Tyler and Jen have an idea to invite all the people who support me to make a very specific commitment in terms of a monthly pledge, either to my GoFundMe or to support the blog via Patreon.

$10 or $25 to help me, keep the blog running, and reopen the pet food pantry.

I’ve done a lot of work with my therapists – yes, I have two therapists: one ‘general’ and one trauma focused – around the type of housing I would need (and want.) Given my history with anxiety and trauma, sharing a living space with someone I do not know is a poor idea. Life in shared settings is not the “Golden Girls’ for 50 something lesbians.

I need to live alone or with someone I already know very well, someone who is trauma competent either innately or from training. I’m perfectly fine with a studio or one bedroom, I don’t need tons of space to live. Has to have reliable heat and air conditioning. Prefer no steps, but I could do one flight. On sight or in-unit washer/dryer is important. Windows that open with screens. Allows pets. Off street parking for Gertie. Relatively flat neighborhood b/c Gertie and hills are a problem. Secure place to store my e-trike outside.

Relatively quiet neighborhood. No known homophobes. As close to Manchester as possible so I can continue to care for my colony and get the pet food pantry running. In Manchester is ideal.

In fact, I found a terrific place in Manchester that’s across the street from Marie, two blocks from my colony, and about a mile from the pet food pantry location. Offstreet parking, community washer/dryer. Allows cats. By Pittsburgh standards, it is not that far above the average at $1290/month. I haven’t rented since 2001, that seems ridiculous to me. The average one bedroom rental in Pittsburgh is $1100 and in Allegheny County $1400.

There are two other nearby units at the same price point.

I cannot afford $1290, especially with my health insurance and health care costs skyrocketing after the divorce. I can’t really afford anything because my income is very low.

I need thirteen people to pledge $100 or 26 people to pledge $50. That’s a lot of pledges. Those who can afford it could chip in $1000 or $1300 to cover one month. Or half a month. It doesn’t matter if we piece together a lot of small pledges.

A lot can happen in a year

I could win/lose an appeal. My blog could be monetized. Lottery. Windfalls. Downsizing. If I had a year to get the pet food pantry in place, I could move elsewhere on the Northside.

The pantry is really weighing on me because more than 400 households/caretakers are connected to us. That’s a lot of people counting on us. We last delivered in July. We have a new location and a plan and some sponsors. What we don’t have is me – I can’t pull off moving and relaunch while I am caught up in personal turmoil. I need to regain my footing.

As I mentioned, we are asking people to use GoFundMe or Patreon to make a monthly donation and investment in me and the work I do for the community. As of today, we have $450/month pledged. That’s a pleasant start. About $800 to go which is a huge lift.

So that’s where we are. I am either going to be homeless or not. There is no calvary. No one has offered me a place to land (longer than 30 days and not private.) Either people are going to chip to help me so I can do the work you value. Or not. If I’m not housed it means no blog, no pet food pantry, none of the other projects. I would really prefer to do the work investing in my community than perpetually scrambling for help for me.

There is not much time. The trial is October 20 and the decree could come at any time. I am going to be asked to leave in 30 days, something we will resist but again there’s no telling. I have to prepare for the worst. Asking my friends to help me pack and move during the holidays is a dismaying prospect.

You can always make one time donations via Venmo and Cash App, or Paypal I’m @ pghlesbian on all. I also have Zelle sitnscoop@gmail.com

So the GAP can be shored up with private support. It isn’t fair or okay to have to ask you this. Nothing about this is fair.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/1g8DCc4WVUA