Pgh Lesbian Correspondents

Today is my 56th birthday. 

This ask is if you can chip in $5 or $6 today here or via other tools, that would be helpful and keep me in fighting form for what’s next. 

Big week, right? 

Signing the divorce papers was a milestone, but it didn’t change my overall circumstances – I’ll still be struggling to make ends meet, remain ineligible for most safety net programs, and relying on the kind hearts of my decent neighbors to survive, even thrive. 

So while this is far from over for me, I am going to try to relax a little bit and develop a plan to move me from here to there. Where is there? I can’t say until the lease is signed. I will answer questions then. Hopefully, soon. It is a tale. 

We’ve set our next micro goal to help me manage saying goodbye to my home of 21+ years and embrace my new home. 

Our goal is $3000. This will cover:

– organizer to get through, sort, trash, donate, and share the pieces of our lives.

– movers because we’ve got multiple flights of stairs with some heavy items to haul

– some basic household furnishings. i created a wish list of items I need – I am very open to gently used/Buy Nothing, but some things have to be new – a new mattress in a bag, two cat trees that don’t smell like other cats, An apartment sized table for four could be gently used, but unlikely to be inexpensive. 

– building blocks, all the things you need but don’t have duplicates. We have three crockpots, but one silverware divider. One toaster, 45 millions mugs. One emergency lantern, two coffee tables. 1 upright vacuum, 2 shop vacs, etc. It is silly to dump all of the existing silverware out of the holder simply b/c she can replace it easier than I can. 

– household necessities like OTC medical items you always need (cortisone cream), bandaids, tweezers, the button sewing kit, witch hazel, etc. Things you share, but don’t make sense to divide into two.

– stock up the fridge groceries

– apartment Ring security cameras and subscription 

Divorce inequality is a real, serious issue for LGBTQ adults.

The underlying factors are real concerns for everyone. It is not okay that at age 56 (as of today) with a masters degree and significant, blogging experience, I’m redundant. And I watch too much Britbox? 

To be honest, I resent that I was asked not to pursue an appeal to leave the door open for someone with a better case. While I understand the rationale, what about me?  I’m willing to take some for the team, but I need to consider my survival needs. 

“As governments fail to respond to—or actively engineer— crisis, ordinary people are finding bold and innovative ways to share resources and support the vulnerable.

Survival work, when done alongside social movement demands for transformative change, is called mutual aid.”

Well, today ‘me’ is going to have a medical appointments to start HRT, work with the housecleaner, and then watch ‘When Harry Met Sally’ while I eat the birthday cake I ordered from Giant Eagle. My birthday present to myself was being squeezed in by my dentist tomorrow. That sounds sad, but I’m actually relieved. I have health insurance for both appointments, transportation/wifi, and can cover the meds.

Unfortunately, I did not receive any dinner or lunch invites, but you could technically consider it birthday weekend, right? The window is still open …

Next up is moving. while relaunching the pet food pantry (the paperwork part.) There is other news to share, but I’ll focus on my birthday today. 

Getting older never bothered me before – I thought the further away from my childhood, the better. Now I’m a little bereft. I feel so alone – my parents are gone, I lost my in-laws, now my soon-to-be-ex-wife. I’ll be losing some of my cats with no option to visit them (that really hurts.) There’s a gaping wound previously filled by a lot of dysfunctional family. I’ve healed enough on my own to welcome them back … sort of? 

Please follow along on my blog for more detailed analysis of what happened, what went righ/wrong, and the issues this has revealed.

My need for financial support has not eased at all. The can was kicked a little further down the road, but there is no justice or accountability here – just power dynamics I can’t resist. 

I’m 56 today. If you can chip in $5 or $6 today here or via other tools, that would be helpful and keep me in fighting form for what’s next. 

Happy Birthday to my childhood/hometown friends Amy and Jeff as well as my cousin Jed. 

$3000 is lofty. There are 400 donors, 120 will read this update. If each of those 120 donated $25 today, we’d hit the goal.