Verizon, Verizon, Why do you treat me so bad?

We’ve been with Verizon since the dawn of cell phones so you’d think we’d be used to their corporate bunkum and balderdash by now. But like a fool I let my guard down about an upgrade deal only to have my heart stabbed with the death of a thousand keystrokes that only a sales chat representative can bring.

Here’s what happened.

Our phones were paid off a year ago and we’ve been limping along to squeeze all the usability out of them.

I saw that Verizon had a Black Friday/Cyber Monday deal offering a Samsung Galaxy S20 for free with no trade-in required. The caveat is that you had to have an unlimited data plan. We’ve held off on that because they do not apply employer discounts (currently 13%) to that level. But Katrina, my agent on 11/12, had good news for me

  • we could now apply the discount to the unlimited plan
  • we were eligible for the free phones with that change
  • we did not have to return our phones
  • out of pocket, we had to pay upgrade fees and sales tax
  • the phones would probably be in our hands in 2-3 days

We also needed to add an additional line and could still get the free phone. How about that?

So our monthly costs would increase with the unlimited plan, but it was a pretty solid deal overall.

Like most good spouses, I needed to review it with my wife and then I decided to log back in and go ahead with the transactions.

Only … guess what I”m going to say? …. If you thought bait-n-switch, you’d win!

During my follow-up chat with Lorraine, I was told that the discount would not be applied to the unlimited plan except for nurses, teachers, and first responders. She also told me that the S20 phones were not free, but we could save $300 each and return our existing phones.

I dutifully reported my chat with Katrina and asked if she could pull it up. Lorraine could not pull it up and did not think it was saved except for training purposes. I told her that I had saved it as a .pdf using their own messaging chat tool. Unfortunately, Lorraine told me that there was no way for me to actually send the transcript to her – no email, no pdf document format, no images, nothing. Did I want to proceed with the changes?

So I was polite (and have the transcript to prove it.) It isn’t her fault that Verizon sucks and pulls this bait-n-switch poppycock.I could also feel her cringing as she anticipated my demand to talk with a supervisor. Instead, I asked her the best way for me to resolve the disconnect in information and she suggested I call customer care. I thanked her, downloaded the transcript again, and logged off.

Now I know that my likelihood of connecting with a human being who could review the saved transcripts and sort out a fair solution is dismal. I can try. Then I can find a new affordable option – we’ll downgrade phones. I don’t need free, but I don’t need to tricked and deceived. Switching carriers is unlikely and everyone knows that – these other folks aren’t going to be any better.

What bothers me the most is not the money, but the sleight of hand tactics and the lost time – I could have been researching other options all this month. The disregard for me as a human being is something that’s so familiar I wonder why I question it.

I’m a household that will have four phone lines, a residential FIOS package, and a solid history of paying our bills. I don’t know if that’s more or less than the typical customer. It shouldn’t matter.

So, Verizon for the win on this one.

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  • You did us all a favor by at least trying. By now we’ve all had a negative Verizon experience. Very smart to download and save your chat, I’ll have to remember to do this.

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