We all get jealous from time to time — what wakes the green-eyed monster for you?
Travel – I wish we could travel. Part of it is cost, of course, but part of it is the practical needs of the pets. We made a commitment to take care of them which they return to us with love, affection, companionship and protection. Several of our pets are elderly so going away requires a lot of arrangements and planning and money. I am envious when people travel because I miss doing so. But I will not wish away the lives of our animal companions so travel will just have to wait.
People who have coffee with Chris Potter – I’ve known Chris casually for over a decade, but I’ve never had a cup of coffee with him. I’ve had breakfast with Tony Norman and drinks (sort of) with Jon Delano. But having Chris Potter’s attention all to myself for an hour with coffee is on my bucket list.
People who are truly close to their family – I am not for a variety of reasons, some of which have to do with my identity as queer woman (‘can’t you just say lesbian?’) and my politics. Some of it is due to historical stuff that isn’t resolved. I’m a little skeptical when people say “my mom is my best friend” but it seems nice. I have a Facebook family relationship. People to whom I am related engage a little bit online, occasionally do some “rah rah” stuff and simply ignore any overture to get together in real life. The sins of the fathers have definitely done some damage (and by fathers, I really mean grandfathers and great uncles and so forth.)
Health – As a person with a disability (hidden or otherwise) I am not jealous when people with other types of illnesses receive attention, support, encouragement, acknowledgement, etc. It isn’t a competition. I wish good health for everyone. But I wish good health extended to everyone. I wish it wasn’t a PR competition. I wish accessibility were ingrained in any event planners mind. I wish there were enough doctors. I am jealous that sometimes it takes so much planning to go to an event or activity and because I’m not “accessorized” with a disability tool, I have to explain, explain, explain.
Tablets – I’d really like to have a tablet. But my cat needs surgery. But this is something I truly covet. Why not be blunt about it? I have hand tremors so having a bigger screen would be a miracle for me. Just ask Ledcat about my text messages. I don’t bother to edit because she can usually figure it out.
In all seriousness, I am not often jealous. I am angry much more often than jealous. I have many material blessings and I have lots of non-essential blessings especially in terms of being validated as a blogger. I get listed and quoted and published and all of that stuff. I don’t get paid for any of those things, but that’s okay. I’m in it for the revolution, not the cash.
Still, I suppose if I pursued more lucrative endeavors, I’d have more cash to pay for pet care and travel. And a tablet.
Hmmmm …. maybe I’m jealous after all?
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