The three worst August 27s of my life

Today, August 27, marks three of the worst days of my life. August 1992 In August 1992, I had just moved to Baton Rouge, Louisiana for graduate school. A Hurricane named Andrew was coming our way. I was terrified. My roommate, a lifelong Louisiana resident, left me to go to her sister’s apartment, saying there […]

I do highly recommend you build your daily plan around your cat.

Each day, I have a plan. I set some goals and make an effort to meet them, with varying results. But I revise the plan and move forward. I try not to define things as failures, simply disappointments. And I try not to think about the next day unless I must. I know people in […]

Things You Might Learn and Experience Processing Your Trauma

Today, I saw my trauma therapist. I’ve been working with her for eight years, through her transferring to three practices and countless psychiatrists. She’s working PT now so I also have a primary care therapist so my time with Brittany is spent on trauma work. After I told her I wrote a post about our […]

Happy birthday to me. Next week, I’ll turn 55.

Content Notes: childhood sexual violence, grooming, birthdays, anxiety, cats I have birthday issues. Not a real surprise to long-time readers. Or my friends. Or anyone who knows me. I used to think it was simple anxiety. But through my trauma processing work and therapy in general, I’ve sort of had a breakthrough. Birthdays are about […]

The Impact of Police Trauma on My Life

Here Come the Police Last night, a friend stopped by with some meals for me. I jumped in the car with her to avoid the torrent of rain. She was parked behind my house in an alley, but under a streetlight. We chatted about our days, caught up on assorted things. It was maybe 20 […]

I need $750 to pay for a historic house appraisal and I need your help to raise it.

I need $750 to pay for historic house appraisal. I need your help to raise it. Today, our lawyers met with the divorce hearing master to review facts.  One thing to note is that we filed a tort for damages last month in Civil Court and it has been moved to Family Court and combined […]

How to cope with relationship trauma and recovery

It feels important to acknowledge this day, this anniversary of a terrible series of events two years ago that upended my life forever. You can read the details here. The details matter, of course, but at the same time – it is today that matters. My due process rights were violated. I was homeless for […]

My Fear of the Police Kept Me From Rallies in the Street

Two pairs of handcuffs

I really wanted to participate in a No Kings rally today. But I was afraid. For 22 months, I’ve coped with the traumas of my interactions with police during and following the fraudulent involuntary civil commitment authorized by Allegheny County OBH on Sunday, August 27, 2023. The police failed me that day and on ensuing […]

Mental Health Awareness Month: Revealing the Layers of My Mental Illness and Childhood Trauma

Content Note: This post delves into mental health diagnoses, but also child abuse, childhood sexual violence, rape, abandonment, and more in great detail. An important piece of my mental health journey has been to embrace the different diagnoses. I have bipolar disorder Type I, I have severe anxiety, and I have complex trauma or cPTSD. […]

Riding in cars with boys – how exposure therapy resolved my trauma

In October 2023, I began writing about two specific trauma experiences arising from my experiences the previous August – police interactions and riding in cars. Since then I’ve been working to process both. This post is about the car trauma. How I realized I had car trauma Back then I wrote “Then we layer in […]