Trauma and Tough Love Do Not Mix

Trauma Tough Love

Content Note: trauma, friends with good intentions, tough love   I did not have a particularly pleasant or peaceful holiday. Turkey Day itself passed relatively benignly until I got home. That’s when an overwhelming sadness swept over me as I realized I had spent the entire day with extended family, but not a single person […]

And I Owe It All To You – Remembering my friend, John Ruffing

Dr. John Ruffing

Dear John, It will be 12 years Saturday since you died. I’m frightened by how quickly the memorials to you are overwhelming the memories with you. I guess that makes sense – we met when I was 15 years old and struggling to figure out all of the things. I was 37 when you died. […]

A History of My Friendship With Mayor Bill Peduto

One of the longest running relationships has been with Mayor Bill Peduto. Our friendship is a very loose use of the word; we aren’t personal friends and have rarely had a lot of face-to-face contact. What we’ve shared has been our investment in LGBTQ and other progressive issues, even though we haven’t always been on the exact same side every time.

The extra bff

When I was a child, the other girls in my neighborhood were firmly cemented into best friend pairs – Amy & Julie, Laurie & Darlene, Sherry & Meg, etc. My role was to be a back-up friend. Sometimes, I was included in group activities. Sometimes, I was called upon if the BFF was unavailable. And […]

I recently learned that I am experiencing a trauma reaction, stemming from the complex trauma I experienced as a child and young adult. I knew the trauma happened, but I had a tendency to minimize it as something not as serious as depression or anxiety. The cumulative impact of the Grand Jury Repory on Sexual […]

Wendi, 31, Describes Being a Trans Ally in Her Workplace #AMPLIFY

Name: Wendi Age: 31 County of Residence: Allegheny, formerly Erie Pronouns: Mrs, Her How do you describe your identity? Ummm. I am a lesbian woman. I am white Italian. Wink* Please describe your coming out experience. Where did you find support? What challenges did you face? I officially came out at 16 to my parents after my dad had seen […]

My Friend John Should Be Turning 50 Today

Dr. John Ruffing

He wouldn’t want a fuss. He didn’t liked being fussed over. More than likely, he’d want solitude and not be particularly thrilled to turn 50. He would definitely not want to me to write (another) blog post about him. “You have to move on, Susie,” he would admonish me. “Stop living in the past.” Past […]

Pittsburgh Dyke and Trans March

Pittsburgh is one of the few cities with a trans inclusive Dyke March – a reflection of how our unique LGBTQ community creates interesting spaces.