Oh, those lesbitarians …

Always taking over with their wholegrain, crunchy goodness and all those eggplants!

Actually, I'm really starting to dig vegetarian food when it is cooked by Jessica at Hoi Polloi.  Or Ledcat.  Or anyone but me.  But still … does everything have to be vegetarian? What next — recycling bins at Wendys?

I regret to say that Lesbian Night at Dozen Bakeshop has morphed into Lesbitarian Night, complete with vegetarian chili (note to anyone reading this — I hate chili more than anything in the world.  Except snakes.  And pickles).   I almost wept to realize that rather than a simple free cupcake, I would have to fork over $10 for a vegetarian meal.  Even if it does include a red velvet cupcake. 

On a Tuesday. 

Sigh.  I mean I can see the cute word play and vegetarianism is much healtheir and it really isn't cool to say LesbiFleshEaters.  Still … cupcakes!  That's part of the lesbian nation, too.  Coffee and a cupcake.  That's all I wanted. 

Plus, the Dozen people aren't even sending me their promotional materials after I hooked them up with Ehrrin and her dyke salute.  No little press releases about chili of the week.  Nothing.  I may not like the chili, but I like the lesbians part.

If Hoi Polloi starts offering cupcakes, I'm set.  Can I go back to the Priory Bakery now that Brenda Frazier lost her election?  All these rules confuse me.  I just want a cupcake!

And you know when I want one?  On Saturday nights when we go out to dinner and have some time to kill.  But it is hard to find a cupcake on a Saturday night that is not encased in cellophane. 

Now I'm going to want one all day tomorrow.  Not a lot of cupcakes in East Liberty.  I'm afraid of Paddy Cakes (why make the cake so fast, baker's man?  why would i want to share my cake with a baby who should not eat cake?) 

See, this is what happens … darn lesbitarians.  Lesbivores?  Sigh.  This is what happens when Jessica gets me to try tofu crumbles and kidney beans in the same evening.  The whole world goes topsy turvy. 

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